James Cameron Owns You
Three Fitty.
Three Hundred and Fifty Million dollars!
Man, did we lap Avatar up like James Cameron’s own puppy dog. Deadline is reporting that James Cameron is going to make upwards of $350,000,000 for the deal he made in directing Avatar. He personally made over $97 million on Titanic. Had enough? Fox is re-releasing Avatar in August to rake in more Cameron dough and Titanic will be released in 2012…in 3D (of course).
James Cameron will easily pocket over $500 million on two films.
Ponder that as you read this from your lonely, sad cubicle.
I’m sure Cameron has this In Living Color sketch running through his head all day. Mo Money, Mo Money, Mo!
Alamo Drafthouse Rolling Roadshow
Quite simply, the Alamo Drafthouse is the greatest cinema chain on the planet. If you ever have a chance to get out to Austin, TX to check it out, I definitely recommend. Alcoholic beverages brought to you at your seat? Check. Extensive dinner menu prepared by top rank chefs? Check. Cinephile events such as “I Love the 80′s” night (The Goonies is next up), Napoleon Dynamite screening with talent show, and other events make this a unique experience at the movie theater. The best thing they have is a Rolling Road Show. Which brings me to the point of this post.
In 2004, The Alamo Drafthouse had its first special rolling roadshow screening. Ticket holders had to venture down the Guadalupe River in canoes to the eerie music of banjos to find their seats in front of a portable screen on the riverbank. Awesome? Yes. They have had screenings at locations made famous by the films over the years that would be surreal to any fan of film. Close Encounters of the Third Kind near Devil’s Tower, The Shining outside of Stanley Hotel in Colorado, and Field of Dreams on the Iowa baseball diamond.
The best one is coming at the end of this month…
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The Name That Shall Not Be Spoken
A year ago, I swore off the name of the director I most despised in Hollywood. I vowed never to watch another movie of his for the rest of time. The last time I mentioned him by name was HERE.
Well, the hack has a movie coming out this weekend. It’s called The Last Airbender. Maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s ridiculousness has been spewed all over my television and computer for the past few weeks.
The reviews are poring out. And it looks like everyone is starting to understand my hate for this director. He once was annoited the next Spielberg…I’ve annointed him King of my Toilet Bowl. I am absolutely loving this hate towards his inability to direct anything.
Currently, The Last Airbender has 10% on Rotten Tomatoes. After the jump are some brilliant quotes from respected film critics. Continue reading “The Name That Shall Not Be Spoken” »
Michael Bay Must Read Film Savior
As horrible as Transformers 2 was, you knew there was going to be a third installment…in 3D. That’s just how things work. You get suckered out of your hard earned money, get bent over by another Hollywood blockbuster, and you come crawling back begging for more.
Oh, but this time Michael Bay has a gameplan. He claims, “One thing we’re getting rid of is what I call the dorky comedy.” First of all, anyone who calls something “dorky comedy” has no capability of knowing a damn thing about comedy in general. But the most revealing, is Bay’s revelation that the racist robots Mudflaps and Skids (yes, that was their name) will not be making an appearance in Transformers 3. Does he finally realize how 1930 that comedy bit was? After seeing Transformers 2, I was inspired to write a poetic review . Part of my review was dedicated to the racist robots:
Black Robots
Robot with gold tooth, standing with a grin.
Speaking jive, bumping fists, everything but eating chicken.
It was shocking he could not read or that he only spoke in slang.
Was this OK’d by execs in ’09? I’m just sayin’… dang.
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I’m not sure what saddens me worse: The fact that I won’t be able to rip apart all things Michael Bay comedy anymore or that they are actually going to continue taking turds on my Transformers. I wish they would have stopped at the amazing first installment.
The Social Network Teaser
The Social Network.
I’ve read the book. And I’ve read the script.
I know that this is going to be one of the best films of the year.
When you are ready, I’ll give you more info. But you’re not ready yet. It might blow your mind. You can’t handle what’s in store for you.
The teaser here is going to play before Inception.
It gives you nothing. Yet, gives you so much.
David Fincher. Aaron Sorkin. Jesse Eisenberg. Justin Timberlake. Andrew Garfield.
The poster art below is perfect.
One of my most anticipated of the year.
Boom.
Running on Empty – LA Without Cars
This might not be Hollywood film related, but it’s awesome nonetheless. Living in the Los Angeles area, you are forced to live and breathe traffic. Young, old, poor, rich — traffic will effect you in some way or another. Film grad Ross Ching created this short film (2 mins) about Los Angeles without cars. He touches upon all parts of L.A. from the great Loyola Marymount University to Century City all the way to downtown and beyond. I drive past that Sex and the City “billboard” everyday — I just wish the 405 was this empty. Radiohead’s “No Surprises” is a great touch.
I live in Los Angeles. I drive in Los Angeles. I think about traffic a lot in Los Angeles. A few months ago, I discovered Matt Logue’s Empty LA photographs. I didn’t think much about it at the time, but every time I was stuck in rush hour all-hour traffic, I found myself thinking, “What if tomorrow everyone’s car disappeared.” What would that scene look like? How would people react? How quickly would the atmosphere rebound from centuries of fossil fuel emissions? So I took Matt Logue’s still photography concept and applied it to something that I do best — time lapse. I built a story around the idea of us being shackled to this ball and chain; this love-hate relationship with whom we spend so much time with here in LA.
Check out his website to see how he did it. Enjoy.
Summer 2010 is here
School is winding down. Sandals are being dusted off. And you’re probably noticing a bounce in your step. To kickoff each summer, I follow the exact same routine. I take 4 minutes out of my day, move all worries to the side, and listen to this song in full. It’s the one of the greatest songs ever created. Really. I can’t even count the millions of times I did the “started at four” move at the 2:43 mark.
Did you listen to it in full?
No?
Don’t worry…I’ve got time. Listen – watch.
OK, good. It’s now officially Summer 2010.
Summer 2010 Movies are knee deep in sequels, remakes, sci-fi, comedy, and adventure. Thanks to the good folks over at Screenrant, below is a Summer 2010 Trailer Mashup. EVERY major summer movie in 2 minutes. There’s got to be something in here you’re looking forward to. Enjoy!
First Look: Let Me In
Late last year, I wrote a DVD Review of the amazing Swedish Vampire flick, Let the Right One In. You can check it out again HERE. It was a perfect movie. So perfect, an American remake was greenlit shortly after the original was released. I said it then and I’ll say it now, Let the Right One In does not need to be remade. But it’s happening. I’ll admit, the cast in this remake is great. Kodi Smit-McPhee (for the 5 of us that actually saw The Road, wasn’t he great in his difficult role?!), Chloe Moretz of Kick-Ass and (500) Days of Summer, and the underrated Richard Jenkins.
My original feeling, though, is that this is nothing more than a juicy, tempting, dangling carrot pre-dipped in Ranch dressing. If you see the Swedish film from just a few years ago, you’ll understand why. It can’t get better. The mystery of the friendship between the children cannot be duplicated. The fact you don’t know whether the mysterious kid is a girl, boy, or neither, also adds to the mystery. In the original, the Richard Jenkins character is the “guardian”; in the American version, he is clearly labeled as “her father.” These are major changes that alter the delicately woven structure of the original.
The first stills from the film were just released. As much as I want this to blow the original out of the water, it’s simply not going to happen.
Let Me In
Release Date: October 1, 2010
Check out all of the pictures and film synopsis after the jump.
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A few thoughts on Iron Man 2
I contributed to the $133 million dollar opening weekend of Iron Man 2. The commercials, the billboards, the product placements — they’ve been shoved down your throat over the past few weeks. Iron Man, Iron Man, Iron Man. Because of that, I’ll keep my thoughts on Iron Man 2 to a minimum. As I often do, I’ll give you The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Iron Man 2.
Psst…see it in IMAX.
Spoilers after the jump, so don’t read on if you haven’t seen it.
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EXCLUSIVE! Patrick Swayze in Iron Man 2
SUMMER IS UPON US!!
Today is the official kick off to the summer season of movies. Explosions! Disappointment! Sub-par acting! Money & Time Wasted! That’s what summertime is all about! Who’s with me?
Today is the premiere of Iron Man 2. Iron Man…IMAX…all kinds of goodness. I hope. I’ll be watching with skeptical eyes, but hoping for the best. At the very least, we will all get surprised with the trailer to the top secret, never before spoken of, J.J. Abrams/Steven Spielberg film.
I’ll bet you didn’t know Patrick Swayze filmed a cameo scene in Iron Man 2. I’ll also bet you didn’t know Iron Man was such a great dancer. The chemistry between these two is amazing. Swayze looks so seductive, and Iron Man’s eyes are just burning with passion. What a fantastic pair. Goodbye, The Notebook. Hello, Iron Man 2. Check out the video for an exclusive (and intimate) scene from the new Iron Man 2.
Who’s going to see Iron Man 2 this weekend?
Baby Movies on Board
I’m having my first baby in 2 months. My sister-in-law had her baby seconds ago. Five friends are having babies in the next 3 months. It’s no wonder the Trojan factory just shut down.
As the great Salt N Pepa once eloquently stated, “Oooh, baby, baby…Baby baby. Oooh, baby, baby. Baby baby.”
Or as the classy Britney Spears sang, “Hit me baby one more time.”
And the classic Sir Mix Alot, “Baby Got Back”
Babies are everywhere — including the big screen. Yep, you guessed it– there are two more baby movies coming your way. One reboot and one based off a commercial. Why? It’s simple and saddening – Hollywood has run out of ideas.
Look Who’s Talking is coming back. That’s right. Look Who’s Freakin’ Talking! But that’s not all. You know those *ahem* hilarious E*Trade talking baby commercials. Yeah, they are turning that into a movie.
First E*Trade. The film is a “mission movie,” about a group of talking babies trying to make their way across the playground. One can only hope this is in 3D. Because that’s what we need. Lame E*Trade Babies creeping me out in the 3rd dimension. I’m not wasting anymore time talking about this. The sad thing, there are people who actually will be excited at this news.
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Breaking News: Ridley Scott speaks about “Monopoly: The Movie”
We’ve talked ad nauseum about the board games to Hollywood film hysteria currently happening. A few trusted sources have told me that Zombies literally have taken over the powers that be in Hollywood and only the brain dead and lifeless are making decisions. The most disturbing of all the board game movies is Monopoly: The Movie, directed by the great Ridley Scott. And now he has spoken about the film.
To catch you up, here was the original story idea from the producer of the film. Nothing below is made up. Seriously. I just puked a little bit in my mouth.
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