At Home Review: Dogtooth (2010)
“I hope your kids have bad influences and develop a bad personality. I wish this with all my heart.” – Father (Dogtooth)
Parents try their best to instill their values upon their children. They try to protect the innocent from all the evils in the world. But then there are the means and tactics instilled by “Father” and “Mother” in the disturbing Greek film, Dogtooth. This Oscar nominated foreign film takes home schooling to a whole other level.
Man eating cats. Why not? Wrong words purposely taught for confusion, of course. (At the beginning of the film we learn “sea” is the word for leather armchair. “Zombie” is a word for a flower.”) No name is given for any family members (Father, Mother, Older Daughter, Younger Daughter, and Son), and somehow, it makes so much sense.
I cannot recommend this film lightly. It’s not for everyone. But for those that can get past the disturbing thoughts of implied incest, mental abuse, and a psychotic main character — this is a gem that will stay with you for awhile. There’s a reason it was nominated for an Academy Award. Its ironic cheerful picturesque cinematography places you in their compound for 1 1/2 hours and doesn’t let you go. Every once in awhile, I stumble upon a film that is so demented, yet so creative, you have to wonder about that person who wrote and created it. This is definitely one of them. This film is truly fantastic, I just wonder how many people can appreciate it.
There’s a simple message here. Don’t overprotect your children. Let them grow naturally. Let them explore the world. You’ll also see the strangest use of a VHS tape you’ll ever see. Really.
Official synopsis:
Siblings who grow up cut off from the world — homeschooled and reliant on one another for entertainment — create their own idyllic alternative universe, which is shattered when their father lets in an outsider. Sex enters the picture when dad begins bringing home a female security officer to satisfy his son’s libido … and suddenly nothing is the same within the highly idiosyncratic family unit.
Stream it on Netflix HERE.
Watch At Home Review – Winnebago Man
I’ve come to the conclusion that there are more crazy than sane people on the planet. The longer I live, the more confirmation I get. Turn on the news. Talk to your neighbor. Check in with a long lost friend. You’ll see what I mean. It’s easy to label Jack Rebney aka The Winnebago Man as crazy from an initial meeting. Whether Rebney is crazy or brilliant, is up for you to decide. But he’s a fascinating character that represents many people that don’t always have a pulpit to speak from.
From initial viewing, the Winnebago Man outtakes on YouTube are laugh out loud funny. This guy is angry — and hilarious at it. He drops the eff bomb incessantly and screams at assistants. All in the name of a RV commercial shoot. This behind the scenes footage was unearthed and showcased on YouTube. Instantly, Rebney was labeled “The Angriest Man in the World.” Check it out HERE. The problem with his label — he didn’t know anything about this tape and his newfound fame. After watching it a few times, you get the overwhelming sense that something deeper is going on. This man is on the brink of a nervous breakdown. The documentary Winnebago Man takes a deeper look into our societies obsession with internet celebrity and the humiliation brought upon the subjects.
There’s a very fine line of laughing with someone and at them. That’s the reason America’s Funniest Home Videos is still on the air. It’s also the reason for the internet celebrities. Some of these internet celebrities didn’t ask for the fame. They are the ones being laughed at. Jack Rebney is one of them – a bad day on the job turns transforms into over 2.5 million video views. Director Ben Steinbauer takes us on a fascinating journey to find the man and learn who he truly is. The initial answers might surprise you. This film gives you a sneaky suspicion that there are millions of Jack Rebney’s out there. People not necessarily looking for the spotlight, but have a heavy dose of opinions to share with the world.
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Watch At Home Review – Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work
It’s seems cliche to call a documentary “an unflinching look” — but this film actually embodies and truly is an unflinching look at the life of Joan Rivers. The insecurity, the anger, the jealousy, the drive, the furs, the loving Mom — after 1 hr. 23 minutes, you feel that you know what makes her tick.
Most people today know Joan Rivers as the Red Carpet host with the sharp tongue towards celebrity fashion. But Joan Rivers was actually a trail blazer for female comedians (or comediennes, I don’t know, not really a fan of that term). In the late 1960′s and 70′s, she broke into the comic scene and offended everyone in her path. “Women shouldn’t speak like that” (said the mustachioed man with chubby arms crossing his chest). But she gained fame and lots of love from the only man that mattered on the comic scene – Johnny Carson. This film takes you on her insecure path to fame, to failure, to fame again, back to failure, to fame again and the never ending quest to say “I’m back!”
Whatever your preconceived thoughts of Joan Rivers are, you should really check out A Piece of Work. It’s a wonderfully constructed documentary that seemed to have no problem showing her at her worst, along with her best. Which is what documentaries should do. I’m fascinated by the sad clown reality of most comedians. They make you laugh and are always at a Level 10+. But behind the scenes is another story. It’s funny. It’s sad. This story is worth watching.
Watch it on Netflix Instant Streaming.
Reviews: Oscar Hopeful Wrap-up
Hello again, friends. Happy New Year! After a short break, I’m back with an arsenal of films under my belt. In between great times with my wife, my little one, family, and friends, I managed to sneak away and catch most of the supposed Oscar contenders. It’s a complicated thing trying to keep up to date with current films, even when I’ve been patiently waiting for years. The little guy always takes priority. That’s obvious. And after he’s prioritized, I try to strategically figure out when, where, and how I can get to the movie theater. Should I take a solo trip late night? Will my wife join me and we get a babysitter? Is it playing at the times that work best for my ever evolving schedule? Back in June of 2009, I first announced Black Swan HERE. I had a quiet excitement to see it ASAP, but kept things Fonzi cool. My wife must read the site, because she was the one to mention we see it the first weekend. Thankfully, I didn’t have to be the weirdo pacing around the house because I want to see a movie. Like I said, Fonzi cool. Kids, are you taking notes?
I was able to see almost every film on my list over the past few weeks. Black Swan, Tron: Legacy, True Grit, Somewhere, and The King’s Speech. There are only two more 2010 films worthy to see: The Fighter and Blue Valentine – both of which I’ll see soon. Two of these films were great, two more gave me a pouty lip + head nod + shrug, another infuriated me. Below are my thoughts & grades on the majority of the Oscar worthy Holiday Movies 2010.
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Review: Winter’s Bone (2010)
I’m gonna give it to you brief and I’m gonna to give it to you straight.
Winter’s Bone, the 2010 Sundance Film Festival darling and speculated Oscar contender, has received high praise amongst the circle of film critics.
Official Synopsis:
“An unflinching Ozark Mountain girl hacks through dangerous social terrain as she hunts down her drug-dealing father while trying to keep her family intact.” (Psst…It’s a movie about the backwoods meth labs)
“Masterpiece”, “Stirring”, “Genuine” are all words that have described this film. With that, I snatched the Blu-Ray off the virtual Netflix shelves and watched it with high hopes.
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DVD Review: White Dog (1982)
If only this film were called Ku Klux Kanine….
Sometimes the most fantastic premise and a ridiculously great trailer can be too good to be true. I was sold on renting White Dog immediately upon the discovery via FilmDrunk. Sigh. Such great hopes can lead to such great letdowns. Let me start off by acknowledging that I get the ambiguous message presented here. The dog is used as a vehicle to illustrate the cruelty, hatred, and anger that breeds from racism. It’s a sensitive subject matter. But no matter what, when we’re talking about racist white dogs, you’ve got to chuckle a bit.
via Wikipedia: White Dog is a 1982 American drama film directed by Samuel Fuller loosely based on Romain Gary’s 1970 novel of the same title The film depicts the struggle of a dog trainer named Keys (Paul Winfield), who is black, trying to retrain a stray dog found by a young actress (Kristy McNichol), that is a “white dog”—a dog trained to viciously attack any black person. Fuller uses the film as a platform to deliver an anti-racist message as it examines the question of whether racism is a treatable problem or an incurable condition.
Problem #1 – The first person the dog attacks is WHITE. Doesn’t that sort of defeat the premise of the movie?
Problem #2 – The music that runs throughout the entire movie is unbearably over dramatic. You’ll hear it in the trailer. But this lasts for an entire 93 minutes.
Problem #3 – Every single actor in the film is terrible.
Problem #4 – See problem #3
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Review: 127 Hours
“Oops” I quietly said to my 10 year-old- self as I ruined the surprise birthday party for my Dad.
“Oops” I told the officer as I got my first speeding ticket within 2 weeks of getting my drivers license.
“Oops” I did it again, said Britney Spears as she shaved her head bald with the paparazzi as witness.
Rarely do we have those “oops” moments that truly define your life. And unfortunately, many people don’t survive the significant “oops” moments. Aron Ralston had an oops moment that he thinks about every time he wants to do Jazz Hands or wants to give a hearty clap. My “oops” moments are irrelevant. Ralston’s changed the entire course of his life.
To say that the story of Aron Ralston is unfilmable is an understatement. A man hikes by himself, slips, gets stuck between a rock for 5 days, cuts off his arm. Doesn’t seem like enough to build an entire story arc around. By no means is this a spoiler — Aron Ralston has been hitting the media circuit a ton. If you’ve missed this one-armed wonder boy, then you’ve been hiding under your own rock.
Simply put – Danny Boyle is a genius filmmaker. He jumps from genre to genre in an effortless fashion. Very few filmmakers could have pulled off the story of Aron Ralston quite like Boyle does here. His visual bravado keeps the film moving along at a brisk pace, the camera rarely is stagnant within a stagnant environment, and he enlightens the audience of a story that needs to be told. The camera dances around from moment to moment keeping the audience entertained throughout the short 93 minute film.
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DVD Review: City Island (2009)
To call a film “serviceable” is by no means a diss. I don’t always need to be swept off my feet by heroic ambitions. I don’t need to see the latest in CGI. Sometimes it’s good to have a light hearted and smart film in your arsenal. It’s a lazy Saturday afternoon — rain pours outside your window and you don’t want to watch Don’t Tell My Mom The Babysitter’s Dead or Dumb and Dumber for the 100th time. City Island just might be your cup of tea.
In what seems to be the cousin of The Kids Are All Right, City Island tackles the dysfunction and secrets harbored in this mostly comedic film. I hesitate to give you the synopsis because, well, it’s pretty bad. The movie’s setup alone will make you cringe and never think twice about renting it. Let me assure you – you should give this one a try regardless of what I’m about to write:
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Review: I’m Still Here
1 hour and 48 minutes or 6,480 seconds. Either way, they are both the same. Both numbers calculate the amount of time I wasted watching I’m Still Here over the weekend. The debate has been loud: hoax or real? After viewing the “movie”, another question came top of mind: Who cares? I mean, really — who f’ing cares? Casey Affleck and Joaquin Phoenix have both come out to say the entire film was a hoax. I wish they hadn’t. It makes the entire experience that much more excruciating. The official synopsis claims that it documents “…Joaquin Phoenix’s transition from the acting world to a career as an aspiring rapper.” Do you know what a Cleveland Steamer is? You will after seeing this movie. Do you want to see an actor play an actor mumbling every line to the point they added subtitles? Do you enjoy watching a rich dude in the Hollywood Hills bitch about his life yet in reality is mocking all of you and laughing all the way to the bank? I promise you this – there is no point to this “movie.” I’m not even sold that they were attempting to make a point. It failed upon arrival like the career of Colin Farrell.
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The Bridge on the River Kwai
Rumor has it , this guy gained all of his film knowledge from Film Savior. Below you’ll see Roger Craig (not the former NFL player) win the highest one day total on Jeopardy with a film centric question.
As nice as it is to see him win the money, a more important question stems from this video. Have you seen The Bridge on the River Kwai? This 1957 classic was ranked #13 on AFI’s Top 100 American Movies list…deservedly so. Starring one of the best American actors ever, William Holden and the brilliant Alec Guinness (Obi-Wan Kenobi) this is a must see. Even if you haven’t seen the film, I’m sure you’ve heard the famous whistle march song. Do yourself a favor -add this to your Netflix queue.
Synopsis:
The film deals with the situation of British prisoners of war during World War II who are ordered to build a bridge to accommodate the Burma-Siam railway. Their instinct is to sabotage the bridge but, under the leadership of Colonel Nicholson, they are persuaded that the bridge should be constructed as a symbol of British morale, spirit and dignity in adverse circumstances. At first, the prisoners admire Nicholson when he bravely endures torture rather than compromise his principles for the benefit of the Japanese commandant Saito. He is an honorable but arrogant man, who is slowly revealed to be a deluded obsessive. He convinces himself that the bridge is a monument to British character, but actually is a monument to himself, and his insistence on its construction becomes a subtle form of collaboration with the enemy. Unknown to him, the Allies have sent a mission into the jungle, led by Warden and an American, Shears, to blow up the bridge.
The A-Team Movie Non-Review
How can one even attempt to review a movie like The A-Team?
a) It’s based off an 80′s live TV show that was essentially a cartoon.
b) Never for one second does it attempt to be anything else but dumb summertime fun.
c) Mr. T and Rampage Jackson played B.A. Baracus…can you really review anything with these two as main actors?
“Fire everything!” exclaimed Hannibal aka Liam Neeson. And so they did. Wow. There is no simple way to explain what I saw on the screen. Besides lots of shaky cam and disregard to a plausible plotline, I’m almost embarrassed to say that I really enjoyed this movie due to the dumb fun it was. The number one culprit of the straight dumb summer fun were the ridiculous stunts (which of course made zero sense). Last week I showcased a snippet of THIS absurd scene from the film. After witnessing it in full context, it is even more batshit crazy. In what logical sense would a writer script the following scene:
An airplane flown by the A-Team gets blasted out of the sky. That airplane happened to have a tank in it. The entire A-Team just happens to get into the tank as the airplane gets shot (let me remind you, they were FLYING the plane). The infamous tank just happens to have just the right amount of parachutes on it to slow down the freefall, you know, in case it ever needed to fly. And then the one liners come flying. The “best” one comes from Bradley “Face” Cooper “Hey Boss, it’s a little stuffy. I’m gonna pop a window.” And so he does. And the cackler shoots planes out of the sky with the tank flying through the air.
Of course, this isn’t ridiculous enough.
To slow down their free fall, they strategically face the barrel of the tanks gun towards the ground. Each shot slows down their momentum. When they get closer…”Fire everything.”
If you can watch/read this and smiled, then The A-Team is for you.
There really is nothing more I need to say. I can explain to you how perfect Sharlto Copley (District 9) was as the mentally unstable Murdock. I can tell you how ready-made Bradley Cooper is for the role of the womanizing Face. I can beg you to understand how perfect Liam Neeson is in practically everything (except Star Wars). But there’s no reason. You’re either in or you’re out. Sure, there’s no plot. Pike…plates…revenge…wrongfully accused…whatever.
The A-Team. Asinine. Ambitious. Awesome. Ambiguous. Awestruck. Ample. Autrageous. Autterly Ridiculous.
