Are you taking the kids to How To Train Your Dragon (in 3D, of course) this weekend? What about the latest Noah Baumbach/Ben Stiller film, Greenberg? I’ve got a suggestion for you. Skip them both. Walk up to the ticket booth (or buy them early on Fandango) and repeat the following.

“Two for Hot Tub Time Machine.” The employee will give you a knowing downwards nod with a slight smirk. You’ll exchange an awkward moment. He knows what you’re in for. And you have no idea.

I had the opportunity to see this film over a month ago. I was looking forward to seeing Craig Robinson. Clark Duke went to the greatest university known to the human race, Loyola Marymount University, so of course I had to support him. John Cusack doesn’t make bad movies, does he? Rob Corddry was an after thought. He wasn’t even on my radar before seeing this film. One month later and his performance in Hot Tub Time Machine still haunts me. You think I’m kidding? I challenge you to erase “the bet” from your memory. He is always that random funny guy that pops in and out of movies (Old School, Blades of Glory, The Heartbreak Kid). This film he gets to shine. Be careful what you wish for. This movie is so wrong, so dumb, and so amazingly great.

In tribute to one of the greatest film titles of all time, I present you the greatest 2 minutes in a Hot Tub not involving booze, flexibility, and your neighbor’s backyard. Why this amazing song isn’t in the film is beyond me. Classic on all levels!

Hot tub! Ha! Da!
Ah-full of water!
I say hot tub! Ha!
Day! Ba! Very, very hot… Very hot! Da!
Hot tub! Gonna get ya hot-a!
Gonna make ya sweat! Hey! Say!
Hot tub! Rub a dub in the hot tub!
Rub a dub with me!

Should I get in the hot tub?
(Yeah!)
Will it make me sweat?
(Yeah!)
Should I get in the hot tub?
(Yeah!)
Will it make me wet?
(Yeah!)
Well, well, well…

Hot tub! Ah!
Get in!
Gonna get in the water!
Gonna make me sweat! Ah!
Here I go in the hot tub!

HHHHIIIGGGHH!!

Too hot in the hot tub! Ma!
Burn myself!
Make it cooler!
Good God!
Gonna make me…

I’m gonna get in the hot tub..
I’m gonna get in the hot tub..
I’m gonna get in the hot tub..
Ha! Lilin! Lidilin! Eh!
A gonna make me sweat-ah!
Dah! Gonna make me sweat!
Gonna make me sweat-ah!
Dah! Gonna get me in the hot tub!
I can’t stand it!
Here I go! I can’t stand it!

Here I go in the hot tub!
Gonna get in the hot tub!
Gonna get it wet-ah!
Good God!
HHHIIIIGGHHH!! Ha!
Good God!
Rub a dub!
In the hot tub!
Rub a dub with me!
Good God!
Rub a dub in the hot tub!
Gonna set me free!