Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen

Release Date: June 24th, 2009

FS Verdict: If you have the ability to remove your brain for 2 1/2 hrs (yes, 2.5 hrs!) or are a 5-12 year old boy – enjoy! Otherwise, consider yourself saved.

So we watched the film “Giant F’ing Robots Fighting Giant F’ing Robots” in all of its IMAX glory.  Upon leaving the theater, we realized that there is no way you can review a movie with an ass-brained plot, nonsensical character decisions, and jive talking/illiterate/gold-toothed robots (unreal: see article and picture of them HERE)

That being said, my 10 year old self would have absolutely loved this movie.  Wall to wall action, Optimus Prime kicking robot butt, and explosions galore.

We will leave you with some Transformers poetry review instead of a real one. Michael Bay didn’t give us the decency to have a written script, we won’t have the decency to write a review.  The 22% rating on Rotten Tomatoes means nothing (see the $60 million Wednesday gross for proof).  Transformers are bullet proof AND critic proof.

An Ode to Michael Bay:

Michael Bay, oh Michael Bay — you did what the public asked.

Explosions and fighting,but forgot to give the writer a task.

Megan Fox and cool cars, for some “that’s a wrap”.

I’d like good acting and plot and less of the “shaky cam” crap.

Black Robots

Robot with gold tooth, standing with a grin.

Speaking jive, bumping fists, everything but eating chicken.

It was shocking he could not read or that he only spoke in slang.

Was this OK’d by execs in ’09? I’m just sayin’… dang.

-Corey @ FS

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